Life can be hard but live and love like today is your last.

 I remember in January of 2008 when I lost my Dad how I felt so empty inside.  It was like somebody had carved me out like a pumpkin and I just couldn’t fill it back up.  I’ve been seeing a lot of loss recently.  I know how hard it is when you lose someone close to you and I also know that it can eat away at you and that’s all you think about for a really long time.  I cried myself to sleep for the first six months after my father’s passing.  I just wanted to see him one more time standing in the garage ‘waving bye’ to us as we left the house to come back to Winston after a visit.  I used to make him promise that he would come back and visit me but no ‘confirmed’ visits yet, I’ll let you know if that happens but then you’ll  think that I’ve lost my mind.  We did have some unexplainable things happen right after Dad’s passing but we can’t say if it was actually him or not.  I think that those that pass before us can actually see us.  I guess that's one of the reasons why I try and live a decent life.  My Dad’s spirit is actually watching me now, or that’s what I think, so I can’t be out there doing things that he would not approve of…lol.  I have had some experiences where somebody came out of nowhere and helped me when I was having a rough time or in a troubling situation so I’m a believer that our loved ones are out there making sure we are taken care of.  If you’ve lost someone close to you and you are still having a hard time with the loss whether it just recently happened or maybe it’s been a while, just think how you would want that person to live if you had passed before them.  I know I wouldn’t want my loved ones to miss out on life by mourning me for too long.  I would want them to live life and each day as if it were their last – then they can come see me.  Hey, your life ain’t over  - someday it will be but today is only chance you will have to experience today, tomorrow is another day and another experience.

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